It’s ok to not know what you want

My sister is currently finishing up her third year of university, and after spending the weekend with her and her best friend it really got me thinking about how I felt back then.

I remember the anticipation of finally finishing education. I really remember applying for hundreds of grad schemes that I didn’t really know what they were, but they seemed like the right thing to do. I remember that most of my discussions with family revolved around the “what next” question…

And honestly, most of all, I felt stressed.

In 2015 I was graduating from my course in “Sociology and Criminology”… something that I had never really had a passion for, but had fallen into by chance.

I had enjoyed learning something new, I loved the girls on my course and it had been an interesting few years, but I knew that I didn’t want to pursue it any further.

Of course, I knew all the things I didn’t want to do, but I felt so much anxiety trying to plan the foreseeable future of my career in the space of a couple of months.

It really felt like everyone else had some kind of a plan together, whilst I kind of bumbled along, bouncing from training to be a teacher, to becoming a kids camp leader to retraining as a nurse.

Believe me, I went through all my options.

But I guess what really prompted this blog post isn’t that I’m saying that it all worked out in the end. Because I’ll be truthful, even at 23 and a few years out of education I’m still debating where I want to end up.

My journalism masters meant that I was able to clinch a job working in social media and my work experience gave them enough confidence in me to give it a shot, but I feel like in the end, there is no magic solution about what’s next.

I decided to roll with the advice that “find out what you love and try to make a career from it.” I knew that I loved writing and words, which is why I’ve tried to pursue journalism.

Sure, I’ve hit some curves along the way- I’m not quite at the place that I imagined I’d be, but that’s ok.

I’m 23, I have time to learn, to try things and to figure this whole thing out. I’m enjoying the freedom to be flexible, to learn skills and hey… it turns out I’m actually really enjoying this whole digital marketing thing!

It’s ok to not have your shit together, it’s ok to swap careers to make yourself happy- and it’s ok to have no idea what’s next. For me, that’s the really exciting part.

Rach

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